Charlie and I (and the dogs) watch a lot of those home improvement shows on cable TV. You know the type: the re-modelers take a run-down house, fix it up nice, and then there’s “the reveal”, when the new homeowners get to see all the nice improvement and fancy furnishings. We watch a ton of these “reality” shows and genuinely have a lot of respect for the creativity of the designers and builders.
Anyway, the other night the lucky couple was impressed with the improvements during the reveal, as they moved from room to room, jaws agape. The wife was super-impressed with the changeover, and, in a space of a couple of minutes, used the exclamation “Oh, My word!” at least seven times (pretty much every time she entered a new room). It was quite annoying: (1) for repetition/lack of originality; and, (2) what does “Oh, My word!” mean, particularly since every reality show is scripted, and you know that the “reveal” has been revealed already, in rehearsal. I can see the director telling the lady, “Then you say, “Oh, My Word!””…again and again. Neither these actors and nor this director will win an Emmy, trust me.
With regard to item (2), I have no idea what it means or where that phrase comes from. I’m thinking that it came from the same place as “Land sakes!”, “My stars!”, “Oh, my gosh!”, and Gabby Hayes’ notorious “Jumpin’ Jehosephat!”.
We Americans have quite a few expressions which, upon closer examination, don’t make much sense or mean anything specific. But, “What the Hell?!”, we use them all of the time. Newcomers to this country must be puzzled, thumbing through their English dictionary. What did he say? What does THAT mean?
Some of the phrases that we commonly use, that don’t make much sense nowadays, had historical roots, like: “Turn a blind eye”, “Run amok”, “Paint the town red”, “Crocodile tears” and “White Elephant”, etc. I guess they’ve become shorthand terms for complicated ideas.
It burns me when I run into someone who has the annoying habit of using the same lame expression repeatedly (like “Oh, my word!”), not bothering to use some creativity and put some variety in their speech. Charlie and I have a friend who uses the word “Stunning!” way too much. I mean, how often can one be stunned? When you are stunned, you are basically knocked to the floor or rendered oblivious to your surroundings…a stun gun kicks the “Living Hell” of you, to use one of those weird expressions. I can’t remember the last time that I was truly stunned…maybe when we got a surprise tax refund. I was totally “gobsmacked” when that happened, I tell ‘ya.
In one of my previous blogs, I chronicled the Oregon Christmas Tree expedition wherein one of our teammates used the F-word in all its variations (as noun, verb, adjective, adverb, and conjunction) as a matter of normal discourse. Kind of like “stunning”, but with more flair and descriptive emphasis. Can you imagine the dramatic effect if the wife had walked into the newly remodeled kitchen and exclaimed, “This is fucking spectacular!”? It would have caught my attention, for sure.
Dirty words, used in the right circumstances, can certainly convey emphasis. Maybe this is what they teach at the Wharton School of Business, which President Trump attended. He uses very descriptive words, like “shithole”. I don’t know exactly what that word means, but I’m guessing maybe a …septic tank? Or, an anus? Or, some people might use that term to describe the President’s potty mouth. But, I digress… However, Presidents are not supposed to use vulgar words like “shithole” in public; at least, they weren’t until Trump came along, because nebulous words like this can be misconstrued.
There has always been a certain component of society who try to avoid blaspheming, i.e. using the Lord’s name in vain.
So, there has been variety of clever word-smithing which attempts to skirt the Commandment or just plain suck up to the Heavenly Father. For example, we have “Oh My God!”, “Holy Cow!”, “Holy Smokes!”, “Geez!”, “Heavens to Betsy!”, “Heaven Only Knows!”, “Bejeezus”, and “Lordy, Lordy”. Or, there’s my old boss Larry Parrish’s standby “Jesus, Joseph and Mary!”, and my Catholic in-laws’ goofy “Crips Mickey!”. Then, way out in left field we have this very peculiar exclamation, of unknown provenance: “Christ On A Crutch!” Now, WTF is that supposed to mean?
Sometimes we have the temerity to actually speak for the Boss Upstairs, like “Bless You!”, or “Damn You!” I think what’s actually intended is that one is (silent prayer) asking God to do one of these things, as in “May God Bless You, Sir!” But, standing on it’s own, “Dammit!” is considered semi-vulgar, even though you might actually be imploring some Heavenly action. Now, a full-throated “Goddamnit” just doesn’t sound polite, which probably led to the famous Gabby Hayes exclamation of exasperation: “Consarnit!” (Of course, he could have totally wimped out and said, “Dang It!”, but, c’mon, were talking about Gabby Hayes here. He invented his own language.)
For the super-straightlaced, interjections of surprise which should offend no one might include “Gee Whiz!”, “Shut the door!”, “Hell’s Bells!”, “Gee Willikers!”, and Gomer Pyle’s famous, exaggerated “Golly!”
And, don’t forget sport broadcaster Keith Jackson’s signature exclamation of excitement, “Whoa, Nelly!”, which he used in football, not thoroughbred racing, telecasts. (Now, if that same supposedly astonished wife had seen the remodeled kitchen and blurted out, “Whoa, Nelly!”…what would we have made of that?)
My Goodness, who came up with this stuff?
The point is, when you say something, it should mean something, rather than nothing, like “Oh, My!”, which is probably a shortened version of “My Goodness!”, which means…exactly NOTHING. Vagueness leads to speculation, which leads to mixed interpretation, which can lead to…fake news. We don’t want any of that, do we?
Therefore, if you want to be taken seriously, say exactly what you mean,and mean what you say. If you do not like black people, have the balls to say it, rather than demeaning their “shithole” country of origin.
Because, even Republicans can’t agree what that means…at least publicly.
