Uconnect

Today is March 23^rd, my anniversary day. Congrats to me (and Charlie)…it’s been 47 great years together. Salud!

As a nice present to my wife (who gets lost a lot while driving!), I decided to upgrade the Navigation map on our 2017 Jeep Cherokee. I don’t really need the Navigation feature that much, but Charlie would like to cruise around town and up to St. George, Utah every once in a while. Our Navigation system is 3 years old and doesn’t even have our street on it, so there is a big problem when Charlie gets lost and wants to “Go Home” using the Navigation GPS.

Anyway, I tried upgrading the system (Uconnect) about two years ago but gave up in disgust. Chrysler/Jeep couldn’t have made it any harder to accomplish. First, you must upgrade the radio software. That, in itself, is a bear…because the process is cumbersome, even for someone who is fairly proficient with computers and technology. The instructions that I downloaded at that time just didn’t work. I put in a few hours on the task and finally said, “Fuck it!”

I’ve run into others who’ve said the same thing about the Uconnect upgrade process. Our daughter-in-law Misty eventually took her Jeep to a dealer and they performed the magic for her. I tried the same procedure with the Chrysler/Jeep dealer in St. George, Utah (45 miles), but they wouldn’t help. Then, I tried the Sahara Chrysler/Jeep dealer in Las Vegas and the gal in Service (on the phone) said, “Sure, we can do that for you. It will cost $180.” So, I made an appointment about two weeks ago.

Today, I drove to Las Vegas (80 miles) for my appointment. The nice fellow that I met in the Service Department said, “Sorry, Sir, we don’t do that upgrade for you. You need to do it ONLINE.” I about blew a gasket with the guy; murder was on my mind. However, I politely just got back in my car and drove 1-1/2 hours back to my house. No anniversary GPS update for my wonderful wife.

Shit.

So, when I got back home, I went to my computer and again went to the Chrysler Uconnect website that had failed me two years ago. And, again, went through the laborious procedure of downloading an update to my RADIO system (which is required before you update your Navigation maps). It a half-hour to download the files onto a USB device. Then, the instructions said to upload that data into the radio system.

No dice; it didn’t work, just like two years ago. Shit.

Finally, I called the Uconnect customer service desk. WTF, I screamed. The techie then walked me through the procedure…again…and it didn’t work. He then said, “Oh, there’s a step missing in the instructions that most people miss. You need to extract the files from the download before you put them on your USB device for uploading.” Really? “Why wouldn’t the geniuses who wrote the procedural guide have included that gem?!!! I’ll bet you that 99 customers out of 100 wouldn’t have figured that out on their own”, I shouted at him. Then the line went dead.

Shit.

And, so, I spent another hour re-downloading the Uconnect radio software update, extracting the files, putting them on a USB device, and then uploading them to the f’ing Jeep. The thing finally updated my Uconnect radio software…after a 3-hour car ride and another 2-1/2 hours of bullshit on the computer, on the phone, and in my car patiently awaiting the completion of the Uconnect update.

And, all of that horseshit that didn’t update my Navigation maps, which was the original purpose of this damned exercise!!

I now have to wait for Fed Ex to deliver a package from Uconnect which will contain the magical Navigation maps USB upload…if they work! Oh, I almost forgot…this upload cost me $165.

I hope it works.

I’m beginning to wonder if Charlie is really worth all this trouble.