Month: June 2023

Charlie and I are on the road with the doggies, enjoying the cool temps and lush, green beauty of the Oregon coast.

Next Tuesday is the Fourth of July. There will be a fireworks show here at the Port of Siuslaw RV Park where we are staying. Should be a great evening.

Besides July 4^th having that patriotic flavor, it also has significance to Charlie and I because we (and her four boys) began to live under one roof fifty years ago on 7/4/73. We will celebrate that accomplishment on Tuesday with a home-cooked, grilled steak dinner, baked potato, and the fireworks spectacular.

Speaking of romance, we have been watching a lot of Hallmark Channel movies while we’ve been in the RV, not because they’re very good but, rather, because our Dish TV program inventory isn’t very good. Besides, Charlie likes them.

Just about every Hallmark movie that we’ve seen has the same sappy plot (relationship-challenged beautiful gal meets handsome Prince Charming, things heat up, then the relationship hiccups badly, then… Surprise!… the couple reconciles, and everyone lives happily ever after).

For the most part, the lead actors and actresses in these rom-coms are WASP professionals in their 30’s, all looking like photoshoot models, with the supporting cast and even the “extras” all clean scrubbed and attractive young people. Evidently, in Hallmark land, there are few minorities, no handicapped people, and no “plus sizes”, either. It looks like everyone in the films come from a casting call for “Glee” or “Up With People”.

Usually, the threadbare plot revolves around a professional woman who’s got a boyfriend or fiancé but who’s questioning her commitment or life priorities. Of course, Prince Charming comes along, sometimes an ex-beau whose got more blue collar roots and/or aspirations. Of course, they are now perfect for each other but take some time realizing it (just enough for a two-hour movie!)

Charlie and I also watch a lot of “crime” docudramas while we’re on the road.

I’ve not done any statistical research on this subject, but my assessment of murders, rapes, assaults, and the like is that 90 percent of the time the victim is either involved in a crummy marriage, has recently divorced from a crummy marriage, has child custody issues with an ex, or is engaging in high-risk behavior (drugs, on-line dating, boozing into the early morning hours, or dating/living with a guy whose been married a half-dozen times).

In business, a very highly desired characteristic of a great manager is the ability to hire good people. “You can’t make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear” is an appropriate example. At least in business, a boss can get rid of a crummy employee with (usually) no muss or fuss.

Not so in marriage.

We watch so many of these crime docudramas where a young woman swoons for some dude with a fancy car, bulging biceps, popularity at the local bar, and so forth, electing to forget and forgive the schmo’s crude behavior, heavy drinking at home, dalliances with other women, and the physical and mental abuse that she incurs from Mr. Wonderful.

Not surprisingly, none of these married folks (women or men) are featured on the Hallmark Channel. Over there, divorces are amicable. On the I.D. Channel, marital strife typically ends in nasty divorces, ugly child custody fights, restraining orders, beatings, shootings, poisonings, suspicious suicides, and “accidental” car crashes. Testosterone-fueled, control freak guys are usually the perpetrators, but we’ve seen many episodes where the wife kills her husband for insurance money, to hook up with another guy, or simply to “move on” from her crummy union.

Most marriages don’t last, at least nowadays. I think I read somewhere that 80 percent of marriages don’t make it past five years. Why is that? Maybe because the couple rushed into the deal, or they didn’t do their “due diligence”, or perhaps the union was economically-, rather than love-, driven.

A specialty of the Hallmark Channel movies is the expensive wedding that costs tens of thousands of dollars, the wedding dress, the bridesmaids, the expensive rings, and the extravagant honeymoon. Surely, all of this money can buy happiness, right? Still, most of these marriages don’t last… despite the ostentatious kick-off ceremonies. Life happens, children come along, careers evolve, and long-simmering resentments pile up. Sometimes the couple is a miss match, obvious to others but not to the eager couple.

I’m guessing that Charlie’s and my wedding, reception, and honeymoon didn’t cost $1,500 bucks. We were wed in an inexpensive chapel, her folks threw a small reception in their backyard, and my brother Terry gave us a few bucks to spend on our weekend honeymoon trip to San Francisco. Then, we went back to work.

In our case, the Return on Investment has been outstanding.

Charlie’s first husband Al was probably the first guy who had ever paid attention to her, and she was in over her head from the start. Al turned out to be a drinker, skirt chaser, and domestic abuser. Charlie endured that while punching out four babies in eight years and working as a nurse, as well. A good Catholic girl, from a good family, Charlie put up with the nonsense as long as she could.

I had the good fortune to be raised by two outstanding parents in a loving household with my three siblings. It was there that I learned the value of hard work, good character, and Golden Rule values, things that I’m sure were emphasized in Charlie’s childhood home. I dated a lot in college, met quite a few very nice gals, and (instinctively, I think) knew what I was looking for in a partner… probably someone like my Mom.

I could tell from the moment I met Charlie that we had the same values and aspirations. I could tell, when I met her parents and siblings, that they were solid people who valued good relationships.

Both of our parents’ marriages lasted fifty years, as has ours. There have been ups and downs, of course, as life has a way of screwing with the best laid plans. But, we’ve persevered, raised fine children, been successful in our careers, and are now enjoying a very happy and satisfying retirement

We’ve beaten the odds.

The whole thing would make a good Hallmark movie… except that we’re not pretty enough.

Gee, the world sure is a different place than I was born in.

Every day I see or read something that makes me shake my head in amazement, bewilderment, or disgust… and, sometimes, all three at once. Yes, I’m an old fogie, but WTF is going on!?

Take, for example, the shitstorm that exists regarding the width of seats on commercial aircraft.

In the interests of making more and more money, by cramming extra bodies in each cabin, the airlines have reduced seat width to the point that “normal”-sized people can barely fit. It is not uncommon for people in adjacent seats to encroach on another passenger’s seat area with their gear, elbows, and body odor, or perhaps fall asleep leaning up against the stranger in the next seat. Abnormal-sized people (like 400-pound slobs) can’t possibly fit in these seats or attach their seat belts. I feel sorry for them, of course, but worse for me when I must fly several hours with a good portion of that passenger’s belly or leg fat laying on me. It’s a bit intimate, wouldn’t you say?

At what point do our elected officials finally throw the red flag on the greedy airline corporations and say, “Get real!”? (Of course, our Congressional do-nothings are beholden to corporate campaign contributions and spend most of their time in D.C. shooting spitwads at each other, so what can we really expect?}

What about all the “LBGTQ” stuff?

I’m not a religious guy but I know (from Sunday school) that “Red, Brown, Yellow, Black and White, they are precious in HIS sight”, i.e. people come in all shapes, sizes, skin colors, deformities, and so forth, including sexual preference that is wired into a person’s DNA. Personally, I’m straight, but I have no problem with someone who is wired differently. I’ve known and socialized with many “gay” people who are, bottom line, just human beings trying to be happy in their own skin. Society should give them the space to do that without criticism, just like we don’t torment our neighbors born with cleft palates, six fingers on one hand, or red hair, for God’s sake.

However, I do have a problem with all the silliness going on about sexual “identity”, as in someone who is bi-sexual insisting on being addressed as “they” instead of Sir, Maam, Mister, Miss, etc., and getting annoyed when that title isn’t applied.

Of course, I’ve always been a bit put off by titles, anyway. I was in the military for four years, where “rank” is more important than intelligence or capability. If someone must rely on rank to get workers to do their job, then that joker has no leadership skills and shouldn’t be bossing anyone. Similar to the dipshit who, when introduced as “Mr.”, sternly rebukes his host by saying, “That’s DOCTOR…”. I get it, he’s got a post-graduate degree, he’s achieved something. Should we give the honorific title of “Millionaire” or “Billionaire” to folks who made a lot of money? “Hi, I’m Billionaire Jones. What’s your name?”

I think we need less labeling in society, not more. I’m Craig. Can I just call you “Jack”? (You know, one human being to another.)

It seems like everyone is our Nation is “taking sides” lately, proudly displaying evidence that they are on teams, competing against other teams. Way back in the day (maybe a couple of decades ago?), no one cared if you voted Democrat or Republican (or something else) except on Election Day. Campaigns for public office occurred in the last several months prior to the election itself. Voting was a private matter, back then. We voted, went back to our lives, and lived with the political outcome until the next election.

Nowadays, a lot of people wear their political affiliation on their sleeve 24/7, with bumper stickers on their car and M.A.G.A. hats on their heads, and actively shun or harass neighbors who feel differently.

Christians feel that everyone else is out to diminish their religion. Unemployed people take it out on Asian-Americans (“The Chinese stole our jobs!”). Gun owners feel threatened by gun control advocates to the point that they insist on openly carrying their guns in public to identify themselves as testosterone-fueled nutjobs and to protect themselves in case they run into another paranoid gun-toting S.O.B.

It’s Fathers’ Day today, and I’m celebrating by watching the U.S. Open Golf Championship on TV.

The most-prestigious of all American professional tournament is weird this year because, after three of the four rounds, Rickie Fowler is leading the pack. The guy has been practically invisible over the past few years (except in TV commercials!), as his game fell apart after marrying his girlfriend. Fowler was ranked as high as fifth in the world (about ten years ago) before going four years without winning anything.

Rickie went to high school (Murrieta Valley H.S. in Southern California) with two of our grandkids, Bailey and Dakota. He learned how to golf at the local driving range where I took lessons. Everyone likes the guy. It would be cool if he could top his career with a U.S. Open title.

The tournament is being played at the Los Angeles Country Club, one of the most exclusive in the country. Homes along the fairways cost a bazillion dollars. One of the homes has a small zoo in the backyard, and another one was Hugh Hefner’s Playboy Mansion. Anyone with truckloads of dough can live there, but golf club membership is restricted: no Hollywood celebrities are allowed.

That’s weird, huh?

This morning, Charlie and I watched a TV program about a team of investigators whose mission it is to track down perverts who use social media to sexually abuse teenage girls. These child molesters find their prey online and soften them up over time, to the point that the child feels comfortable with hooking up with and performing sex acts with (typically) guys who are as old as their parents.

This type of crime is made possible by the fact that young, impressionable kids have the gateway to their private lives in their pocket or purse… their cell phones… and often use them foolishly via social media to provide a lot of information to people that they don’t even know.

I think parents who provide cell phones to their pre-teen or teenage girls are setting them up for disaster. The kids are too young to appreciate the danger lurking on social media and are typically irresponsible and rebellious at that age. A skilled child predator knows exactly what buttons to push to influence his potential prey.

The “grooming” of children to affect certain behavior is a BIG dog whistle in convervative G.O.P. politics right now. The fear is that Democrats, “liberals”, communists and such (i.e. non-conservative folk) are attempting to corrupt young minds on topics such as sexuality, racism, history, religion, and such.

Presidential candidate/Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, in an attempt to “out-Trump” his 2024 opponents, has gone on a scorched earth campaign to root out non-conservative thought and behavior in his State. He’s even taken on media giant Walt Disney Corporation, whose family-oriented animated movies and theme park characters often support modern ideas of “inclusivity”. Let’s face it: Disney is as capitalist as any business in America, and would be foolish to chase away potential customers who happen to be handicapped, queer, or non-Caucasian.

DeSantis and his Republican legislators in Florida have taken the lead in gay-bashing (“Don’t Say Gay!”) and anti-“woke” rhetoric. The objective, it seems, is to groom young people to believe that homosexuality is inherently evil, that systemic racism in America does not exist, that guns are good, and that Christianity is/should be the State religion.

The idea is to turn back the clock about one hundred years, which would be quite the trick if it could be done.

The problem with “grooming” of this sort is that, in the absence of learning facts and reality in school, youngsters will instead learn untruths, conspiracy theories, fake news, and hurtful gossip via social media and about sex via crude drawings on the walls of public restrooms.

It seems weird that responsible public officials would advocate un-learning stuff that mankind has learned, often at great cost. As the saying goes, “Those who ignore history are bound to repeat it.”

On the other hand, we’re talking about conservative political thought in the Bible Belt, where the un-stated goal is to revisit a society in which that “old time” religion played a stronger role. Unfortunately, that was also a time when pious conservatives wearing hoods were harassing and lynching their Black neighbors, most of whom were church-going Baptists like themselves.

Talk about weird!

Yeah, but that’s not the end of it. Wannabe President DeSantis has also declared that he intends, as the leader of our Nation, to (a) rename military bases in honor of traitorous Confederate generals, (b) to pardon the January 6^th 2001 Capitol Riot insurrectionists, and (c) pardon Donald Trump for the many crimes he has committed in the past few years.

That is what we need in this country: a President who doesn’t support the Union, doesn’t support public education, and enjoys harassing and belittling citizens who don’t look and act like himself.

Of course, most Americans would be ashamed to act like DeSantis in modern society. We’ve evolved; evidently, he hasn’t.

Or (scarier thought) he is acting like this simply to suck up to the right-wing Republican base that is controlled by Donald Trump. The reality is that he won’t get those votes unless (a) Trump drops out of the race, or (b) he publicly sucks Trump’s dick.

That would be weird, but what do you expect in these unusual times?

My best friend Lloyd relocated to South Africa this week, so now I have no real tight “buddy” to hang with and do man things with, like golf, hike, talk politics, and tell dirty jokes.

I’m going to miss that S.O.B.

On the scale of “socialness”, I would say that I’m down in the introvert area: I would rather observe than interact with people, think than emote, and keep my opinions to myself unless provoked. Llovd was good at provocation, always there with some outlandish rumor or “fake news” tidbit to rile me. It was fun to watch his flawed brain in action (haha) tormenting me.

Our friendship was lots of fun while it lasted… about 5 years.

I’m a friendly guy but not outgoing like my wife. Charlie makes acquaintances by the bucketload; if she was a social media user, which she isn’t, she’d be “friended” by hundreds if not thousands of people. Charlie has had several BFF’s, has many business-related buddies, and has been in leadership with several organizations. If she walks into a meeting or social event where she knows no one, she has several new friends when she walks out. At the same meeting, I would most likely sip a drink, observe people, and speak if spoken to.

I was a shy, red-headed nerd in grade school who concentrated on learning and playing sports. I was socially inept with girls (interested but terrified) and didn’t date until my last month in high school. And, that one date (the Prom) was arranged by my future sister-in-law! What a loser!

I had two best friends in high school: Pat and Glenn. They were my neighbors, and we did a lot of cool things together. Many years later, I was Best Man at Pat’s wedding, and he was my Best Man when I married Charlie.

My confidence was boosted by sports (by age seventeen I was a two-sport Varsity letterman and a lifeguard/swim instructor in the Summer) and a Public Speaking course that I made myself take as a Senior in high school. In college, the social floodgates opened for me: I joined a fraternity, enjoyed the parties, dated a lot of different gals, and learned from all those experiences.

Still, I didn’t have any close guy friends. My two previous best buddies were now attending other universities (Pat at U.S.C. and Glenn at U.C.L.A.), and I had no super-tight bond with any of my frat buddies. I was too busy working and studying, I guess, and my social life consisted of making up for lost time with the “other” sex.

During my four years in the military, I basically kept to myself, not really forming any tight bonds with anyone. I worked in hospitals as an x-ray tech and preferred to work night call, basically running a one-man crew from 5 p.m. to 8 a.m. I golfed on my time off and rarely dated, developing no new long-term friends, male or female.

Shortly after leaving the Air Force, I met Charlie and her four boys, we got married and started our Big Family Adventure. For the next twenty years, my career with the County of Riverside absorbed a lot of my attention, as did my budding relationship with my four stepsons. They, essentially, became my “guy” friends who absorbed most of my “free” time that wasn’t involved with my wife.

In the three decades of my public sector work, I developed good friendships with many fellow workers. Charlie and I fraternized with some of my work buddies, we threw parties, we skied together, and such. I developed a golf buddy in my first boss, Planning Director Jack Newcomb, which carried over to my time in the County Road Department, where Jack became the head honcho. Later in my career, with the County Executive Office, I enjoyed a close relationship with the CEO, Larry Parrish. I especially enjoyed our lunches, several times a week, when Larry and I and other Exec Office leaders would discuss important stuff and talk about local politics while enjoying good food.

Interestingly, when I retired from the County, I retained none of those friendships. I guess I just moved on to the next phase of my life and never looked back. Is that weird?

In the early years of retirement, I did a lot of golfing at our home course, Bear Creek. Me and four other buddies had a “regular” Saturday game where we gambled, told jokes, busted each other’s balls, and laughed a lot. This went on for many years. However, when Charlie and I decided to quit the country club after about twenty years, those friendships seemed to vanish, and I’ve not talked to those guys since then. Huh?

At about that time, I took up equestrian activities, courtesy of a friendship that Charlie developed while a member (and, later, President) of a local charity. Ed Metzler, the husband of one of the charity’s members, was a first-class cowboy who took the time to teach me about riding and caring for horses. After a few years, I got a horse of my own (which I stabled at Ed’s ranch), and regularly rode trails and rodeoed with Ed all over Southern California. We were also members of a riding fraternity, the Rancho California Caballeros.

After about five years of doing that, I got disinterested, sold my horse, and went back to golf for a while. And, poof, just let my friendship with Ed (whom I adored) go fallow.

At about that time, my son Jonathan introduced me to bowling. I got “into” that sport in a big way, taking lessons, playing in leagues, and meeting a bunch of new friends. One of my bowling buddies was also a golfer: his name was Gary Golnick. He and I really clicked, with similar personalities, and regularly bowled and golfed together for several years. But then, my arthritic fingers caused me to give up both golf and bowling. Gary and I never spoke again!

What is it with me, anyway? I seem to have no problem just moving on from good friendships. That doesn’t seem normal, but it doesn’t bother me. Weird, huh?

My most recent man buddy, Lloyd, is moving on to a life in South Africa with a long-time girlfriend (Juanita) that Charlie and I know and love. They’ve tried this before; hopefully, the second time is a charm.

Lloyd is like me in some respects: he’s always looking forward to the next adventure. He’s 74 now, has plenty of money, and probably thinks this most recent “adventure” may be his last. If I were in his shoes, I’d probably give the South Africa adventure a go. After all, he’s been in Mesquite, Nevada for five years and has done and seen just about everything the desert has to offer.

I am going to miss this friendship.

For one thing, Lloyd, Charlie, me, and the three dogs do a lot of socializing together. I typically hike in the desert with Lloyd (and neighbor Mac) once a week, and we alternate homes (Lloyd’s and our) every week for a meal and table games. Lloyd is very nice to Charlie, often brings her flowers, and she adores him.

Lloyd was a fun guy to talk with. He’s a Vietnam combat vet, he was a C.P.A. with a Big Five firm, later became a financial consultant, owned a vineyard in Napa Valley for many years, has traveled the world, and is never shy about sharing his political views and conspiracy theories.

I don’t agree with all of Lloyd’s political opinions, and we occasionally throw barbs back and forth, agreeing to politely disagree but still remain friends. Truthfully, Lloyd is probably the most racist guy I’ve ever known (not keen on Blacks, Latinos, and Asians, in particular) and is antisemitic to a fault, blaming most of the world’s problems on Hungarian-born,  Jewish billionaire George Soros. I think Lloyd would be perfectly at ease living under a dictatorship led by tech innovator and billionaire Elon Musk.

Musk, a South African, abandoned that country and Lloyd is moving there for love. I hope it works out.

Despite having philosophical differences with Lloyd, I’ve always enjoyed my time with him. He’s seen and done a lot of things, and always has a joke or story to enliven the conversation. He’s a good hiker, a lousy golfer, and a good card player. He is a guy who you would want in your foxhole protecting your back, to use the military expression for a diehard buddy.

I’m going to try to keep connected to Lloyd and follow his adventures in Africa. Hopefully, he and Juanita will have many happy years together down there: he deserves it, for sure.

Another close friendship down the tubes! But I will carry on.

The thing that saves me, socially speaking, are the friendships that are close to home. I have been married to the same, wonderful woman for almost fifty years. We are different people in many ways, but we “click”. I also have sons that I regularly talk to and see on occasion. In addition, even though we are physically separated, I have a good relationship with my two sisters Kellie and Claudia and my brother Terry.

And, of course, I have three BFF’s living in the house with me: our Boston Terriers (Baby, BonBon, and Vinnie). I spend a lot of time with them and we talk about everything.

In summary, I make friends, I lose friends, and I move on, much like everything else in my life. The thing that saves me, in a social sense, is my family: it’s rock solid.

I’m a lucky guy to enjoy the friendships I have yet to squander.

There is a lot of hue and cry going on in Republican circles lately about an alleged effort by the Biden Administration to unfairly prosecute ex-President Trump for a variety of alleged crimes.

The G.O.P. brain trust brands this so-called persecution “weaponization of the justice system” aimed to bring down the front-runner for the Republican 2024 Presidential nomination.

However, as usual, Donald J. Trump brought all the legal scrutiny upon himself by simply being Donald J. Trump. He can’t help himself: he is a narcissistic, egomaniacal blowhard with a lifelong propensity to flaunt laws and then “lawyer” the courts to death until someone in authority simply gives us and says, “No mas!”

Of course, the wailing and gnashing of teeth by Republicans over Trump’s legal problems wouldn’t be necessary if their hero was a law-abiding man. Unfortunately, he isn’t and never has been, and is embroiled in several criminal and civil cases relating to his behavior during the 2016 Presidential campaign, his Presidency, and some actions he has taken since losing the 2020 Presidential election to Joe Biden.

This week, Trump is being indicted on 37 counts of possession of government documents and obstructing efforts of the Feds to retrieve those documents. A few weeks ago, Trump was found guilty of defaming a New York woman who claimed he’d raped her years ago and ordered by the court to pay her $5 million. (The day after the verdict, Trump again publicly defamed the lady and it appears that she has filed another lawsuit against him.) The ex-President will soon stand trial for “hush money” that he paid an porn actress to stay silent about their affair… money which he claimed on his tax return as “legal fees”. Trump is also expected to be indicted by a Georgia prosecutor for attempting to extort the Governor and Secretary of State regarding the 2020 election results (a phone conversation which was recorded by the Governor). And, then there is the matter of the January 6^th, 2021, Capitol Riot, which every American knows was incited by the sore-loser President. Federal prosecutors have been working their way up the food chain, prosecuting and convicting hundreds of participants in the seditious attack on Congress. All that remains to be seen is the indictment of the ring leaders in the Trump Administration.

To say that Joe Biden and his Administration are orchestrating these many legal battles is laughable, as many are State-level prosecutions. In fact, the Federal prosecution (illegal possession of government documents and obstruction) came only after two years of polite requests by the government, which Trump ignored and then tried to hide the boxes of loot.

Let’s face it: if the alleged perpetrator of this crime had been Joe Sixpack of Saginaw, Michigan, the F.B.I. would have raided his home two years ago, manacled Mr. Sixpack, perp-walked the traitor in front of television cameras, viciously interrogated him about the Top Secret docs in his possession, and then tried and convicted him in an expeditious manner. Joe Sixpack would be languishing in a Federal penitentiary right now.

The only reason that this hasn’t happened to the ex-Prez is because of the deference shown to ex-Presidents. Let’s all be honest here: Trump goaded the Feds into arresting him so that he could make a campaign issue about it. Not surprisingly, G.O.P. mouthpieces are now making a big deal about the prosecution of a Presidential candidate, as if the ex-President’s retention of Secret and Top Secret documents was normal practice. In fact, it violates a Presidential Order regarding the safeguarding of sensitive docs that Trump signed while he was in office.

The Republican Party, once the so-called “law and order” Party, says that prosecuting an ex-Prez is “unprecedented”. It is, but America has never had a scofflaw like Donald J. Trump become President before. The guy not only violates the laws but brags about it. His G.O.P. enablers in Congress encourage this behavior by making excuses on his behalf. These are the same knuckleheads that chanted, “Lock her up!” during Trumps 2016 campaign against Hillary Clinton.

How ‘bout we lock HIM up?

Donald J. Trump is amassing quite the resume as a politician. He lost the popular vote for President twice (by 3 million then 7 million votes), was impeached twice by Congress, scammed supporters out of an estimated $250 million relative to his shameless “Stop the Steal” campaign, appointed a slew of unqualified political hacks to lifetime Federal judgeships, orchestrated an attempted coup against Congress, and faces a raft of criminal charges in State and Federal courts. He also spent hundreds of millions of dollars on border walls that he promised voters would be “paid by Mexico”. He also undermined the Nation’s response to Covid-19, reassuring the public that the pandemic that ultimately killed a million Americans was “nothing”, “a few people involved”, “would be gone by Spring”, and so forth. Last, but not least, he undermined our traditional allies, sucked up to dictators such as Russia’s Vladimir Putin, China’s Xi Jinping, North Korea’s Kim Jong Un, and Saudi Arabia’s Mohammad bin Salman.

Accordingly, Donald J. Trump is the frontrunning G.O.P candidate for President in 2024.

Just what this country needs… a WEAPON against democracy!

We’re on the road now in the motorhome, enjoying ourselves and dealing with whatever obstacles come our way.

That’s the thing with RV’ing: problems start to appear as soon as the rig leaves the driveway.

We have a well-built Class A motorhome that has a million bits and pieces and a lot of technology, not to mention the Cummins 400 HP Turbo diesel engine, the Allison transmission, a Firestone Itelliride air ride system. an 1800 Onan generator, six huge tires, four “slides”, a smart TV, a satellite Dish receiver, a Starlink dish (for WiFi), a two-door refrigerator, a washer-dryer combo, a total of eight batteries, an inverter, a Queen-sized Sleep Number bed, and much more. We also tow our Jeep behind the RV using a Blue Ox system.

Did I mention that our motorhome is 18 years old?

So, as soon as we head away from Mesquite toward our first destination, all these items are subject to wearing out, breaking, or failing. Every nut and bolt in the chassis and living quarters is, while we’re heading down the highway, under attack by potholes and rough roads, which have the effect of loosening everything up.

Imagine putting your home on wheels and driving down the road: something’s bound to fail.

We’ve had many unexpected “surprises” over the 8 years that we’ve been traveling in this RV, so we’ve become used to rolling with the punches, so to speak.

This season has been no exception.

On our pleasant drive through Nevada, we hit a large pothole. At our next stop, I realized that I had a water leak at the rear of the motorhome, dripping from the rig to the ground. Eventually, I figured out that the impact of hitting the pothole had jostled our washer-dryer unit off of its pedestal and had cracked the water line that supports the unit. That is not something that I can repair myself, as it is too cumbersome and I’m not an RV plumber. We will have to wait until our stop in Coos Bay to have an expert fix it.

Last year, on a trip to Denver, we lost the driveshaft. It was an expensive tow and fix but, luckily, insurance paid for 90 percent of the job. Also last year, our refrigerator gave up the ghost and we had to replace the cooling unit. That cost us a few thousand dollars.

RV living is not cheap, particularly in a sophisticated rig like ours. The parts are typically specific to an RV and the labor (for qualified RV repair guy) is expensive… if you can find a good repair tech when you need him.

I can fix most of the stuff that comes loose or breaks (due to bumpy roads or old age). Our RV has large storage compartments under the living quarters, and I keep a lot of tools and parts there. One thing that I have done (to simplify living in the RV) is to disable some of the features that we don’t use. When we bought the RV, it had a CB radio set-up, a 5-disc CD changer, a macerator (for the septic system), an outdoor shower set-up, a roof-top antenna, and a bedroom TV. I’ve gotten rid of all of those things because (a) we don’t need them, and (b) they are just another piece of equipment that can break.

It takes a lot of patience to travel and live in an RV for months on end.

Things are going to break (you can count on that!) and there’s no use getting too excited when the inevitable happens. It’s all part of the great adventure. As Charlie and I know, an RV’er needs to “Improvise, adapt, and overcome”, and we’re in some stage of that continuum (it seems) at all times.

I was repositioning my portable satellite dish onto the top of the RV the other day, trying to obtain a good TV signal in the midst of campground with a lot of tall trees. I’ve done this many times, but never after having a couple of strong Margaritas. I fell off the ladder after putting the sat dish on the roof, and I ended up with bruised ribs, a deep thigh bruise, and lots of scrapes. I’m lucky, as I could have been severely injured. “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”, right? Anyway, no more roof work this week: I had a mobile fix-it guy come by and reposition the sat dish, and now it works great. (What a nice guy, too: he didn’t charge me! I think he felt sorry that I fell off the ladder.)

Thanks to a salesman at Fred Meyer (supermarket) here in Florence, Oregon, I was able to figure out the secret to “streaming” programming from our “smart” TV. Had I been a ten-year-old, I would have known instinctively how to do it. However, I am an old geezer who’s pretty confused by new technology, so I really appreciated the “heads up” by the young salesman. Now, we’ll have the option to watch Dish TV and streaming programming from Netflix, Amazon Prime, and YouTube whenever we want.

There is a great RV repair shop called Gib’s RV in Coos Bay that we’ve patronized several times. They are capable and fair in their pricing. I am looking forward to seeing them in about a month, as I have the washer-dryer issue to resolve and also a speedometer cable “whine” that annoys the hell out of Charlie, the dogs, and I when we are driving between 45 and 55 m.p.h.

As I’ve said, there’s always SOMETHING that’s on the blink. No need to get excited; there’s always tomorrow or the next day when I can tackle the “emergency”.

Patience, in an RV, is definitely a virtue.

I’m getting old, and it sucks.

We’re in Oregon now, in the motorhome, and I climbed a ladder to allow me to put our satellite dish on the roof. I had just finished off a couple of margaritas, and wasn’t thinking straight, figuring that this install was going to be a piece of cake.

I fell off the ladder and banged myself up pretty good. The main injury was a deep muscle bruise to my left quadricep muscle (above my knee), so I’m limping around like “Chester” (from the old Gunsmoke TV series). I also bruised my ribcage, and it hurts when I sneeze or cough.  I’m 75 but feel 105 today.

I used to be an athletic guy, and never gave a thought to the time that would come when I couldn’t just jump over a stream, heft some heavy object over my head, throw a baseball to a grandkid, or see well enough to play billiards. Every part of me is slowly deteriorating from those salad days when I could do most everything with ease.

I was a pitcher in Little League, lettered in Cross Country and Basketball in high school, swam competitively and was a lifeguard/swim instructor, and water skied, snow skied, and played pool at a proficient level. I was a certified scuba diver and a single-digit handicap golfer. I held a 200 average in bowling and rolled four perfect 300 games. I hiked Mount Whitney several times, Half Dome once, and the Crazy Horse Monument, as well.

Easy peezy… those were the Good ‘Ol Days.

Slowly, over the past ten years or so, my strength, agility, coordination, and confidence have diminished to the point that I’ve virtually given up any athletic pursuits other than an occasional hike or walk with the dogs. I recently gave up golf, sending my Scotty Cameron putter to son Jonathan and the rest of my clubs to son Jeff. It had gotten to the point where I was only playing a few times a year and it was hard to shoot a respectable score.

What’s left to do at this point?

I can still write my blog, tend to my landscaping chores, perform “Honey Do” fix-it duties, and love my wife and dogs. Luckily, my eyesight and concentration are still good enough to allow me to drive the motorhome without crashing or injuring people. Who knows how many more years I have doing that?

Luckily, my brain still works. I can read books and the news, watch TV, and carry on a conversation. I have my opinions, which I try to keep to myself, and occasionally (every day?) something I read in the news totally annoys me. It often seems like the U.S. is going down the toilet intellectually, but maybe that’s just the Old Man in me failing to be “modern”?

I’ve done a lot and seen a lot. The things that I am most proud of are the kids that I helped raise and my rock-solid marriage to Charlie, with whom I have shared many wonderful memories over the past 50 years. I also had a very rewarding career in local government and have done a lot of traveling around America and the world.

I will be 76 years old in December. If I ran for President in 2024 against Joe Biden and Donald Trump, I would be the YOUNGEST candidate on the ballot!

People need goals, even old geezers