Who Knew Presidenting Would Be So Hard? – Adventures of Craig and Charlie

It is pretty easy to imagine that someone else’s job would be a snap to learn or do, particularly if you don’t have to actually put your money where your mouth is. But, truth be told, every profession and every job out there takes a lengthy amount of time to master. No matter whether your experience comes from higher learning or the School of Hard Knocks, expertise and wisdom are hard won, whether you are a brain surgeon or journeyman plumber. Or, a public servant.

The idea that someone with no experience whatsoever can take on a completely new job and master it immediately…is poppycock; it only happens in fairy tales (and Trump University advertisements). Promises to immediately solve a problem, or, in the case of the Federal government, make an established government program go away “the first week that I am in office”, are proof that the speaker doesn’t understand how government or politics works.

The President’s reaction to his stalled Trumpcare initiative was the now famous, “Who knew that health care could be so complicated?!” Quick answer: The G.O.P.-led Congress, who couldn’t come up with a better plan in eight years. And, can’t make it happen now that they’re in complete control of Washington D.C.!

Which brings me to the “Make America Great Again” fable that America is now trying to endure. It’s become more like “Make America a Laughingstock”.

First and foremost is the uncomfortable fact that, once you’ve reached the top spot in an organization, you are now responsible for the whole thing, warts and all. You wanted the job; now, it’s yours. Make the thing better; don’t bitch about your job. You gather your teammates about you, seek advice, then roll up your sleeves and get to work. Denigrating your employees or allies (i.e. Cabinet members, Congress, staffers) is not the path to success.

A fellow with many personality flaws and life baggage, coupled with zero experience in government, is now C.E.O. of an extremely complicated organization…about which he knows nothing but what he hears on Fox News and reads in the National Enquirer (stories that he probably had planted, by the way…look at this beauty).

Anyone in his organization who actually has expertise, and could provide him with sound advise, he ignores.

What could go wrong?

Having declared that the Nation is “broken”, and that Washington D.C. is a “swamp” (which it most certainly has become), our President, who has no experience governing, has apparently decided that he will emulate Seinfeld’s George Costanza, and do “the opposite” of what everyone else has done.

He will suck up to the Russians, insult our allies, appoint industry lobbyists to run watchdog agencies, disregard scientific evidence, appoint relatives to important positions, get rid of or attempt to get rid of Federal employees who are more loyal to the Nation than to Donald Trump, ignore conflict-of-interest and transparency norms, and eschew adult, diplomatic discourse in favor of crude, bullying name-calling. This, in his estimation, is what being Presidential is all about; i.e. doing the opposite that every President before him has done.

Of course, the key attribute to a good manager is hiring the right people. So far, our Fearless Leader has shown an aptitude to do the opposite.

The result: dysfunction, frustration, and embarrassment. In a word, failure, not the “winning” that Trump bragged we’d all get tired of.

And, lots of lying, about virtually everything that his one-man team is failing at.

If the Press doesn’t toady up to his “opposite” plan, then they’re the Enemy, and whatever they’re saying is rubbish. And, when he gets frustrated by his own lack of accomplishment, or is feeling sorry for himself, he lashes out at familiar targets.

(Hey, Buddy, maybe you haven’t noticed, but…the election is over. You won.)

Things have been so dysfunctional in the Trump Administration that rumors, whispers, leaks to the Press, and backbiting among supposed team players have been rampant. That’s what happens when you have a One Man Team…people start sniping.

First, he canned his buddy, his first, proud appointee, N.S.A. Director Flynn. Next, he fired F.B.I. Director Comey, whom he loved during the campaign. Last week, Press Secretary Spicer, who Trump embarrassed week after week, got the ax. The President has been publicly itching to fire Special Prosecutor Mueller (for looking into the Russia stuff), but hasn’t yet figured out how to do it. But, he’s working on it. And, now, it appears that Attorney General Jeff Sessions is in the President’s gun sights, apparently because the A.G. didn’t stop the Kremlingate investigation in its tracks. (How ironic, because then-Senator Sessions was the first politician to endorse Donald Trump’s presidential ambitions.) I guess it’s the old, “What have you done for me lately?”

The President’s public humiliation of his Attorney General has been particularly savage, even for Trump. Sessions’ response to his undeserved public flogging has been measured: “It’s been hurtful”.

One wonders how much abuse a proud, ex-Senator from Alabama can endure. I give him less than a month…

There is so much extraneous, juvenile crap going on in Washington D.C. right now that the Trump Administration may go a whole year without any legislative accomplishment, to the chagrin of the G.O.P., which controls the Legislative branch of government for the first time in 10 years. How embarrassing! The next catastrophe will be The Federal Budget.

Of course, the “Russia thing” is a great black cloud hanging over the White House. Mr. Trump, his son Donald Jr., and his son-in-law Jared Kushner, who all look pretty slimy at this point in the investigation, have declared that all of this hoopla is “fake news” and a “nothing burger”.

It’s curious, though, that a bill cleared Congress this past week with only three dissenting votes out of 422, that ties the President’s hands with regard to lessening sanctions on the Russians for, among other things, meddling in the 2016 elections. The Senate then approved the bill, 98-2. Evidently, even his own Republican party believes that “where there is smoke, there is fire”.

Ex-jock/killer O.J. Simpson got out of prison this past week. He’s probably in line for an appointment to Trump’s staff.

The President was rumored to be having his many attorneys investigate the legalities of the Presidential Pardon, just in case he has to bail out a relative or friend or maybe himself. Trump verified this last week when he announced that he has virtually unlimited power to issue pardons. Question: Why the preoccupation with pardons, if, as the President has insisted, no one has done anything wrong?

The most newsworthy event of the week was not the failure of the “Repeal and Replace Obamacare” effort, but the replacing of the White House Communications Director with a Wall Street wiseguy Anthony “The Mooch” Scaramucci, who immediately proceeded to publicly call out Trump’s Chief of Staff Reince Priebus as a “fucking paranoid schizophrenic”, labeled Trump top advisor Steve Bannon a “cocksucker”, and threatened to fire a bunch of White House staff for not supporting the lame ideas of the Commander in Chief.

Swear to God!

Seriously, could this Administration stoop any lower? But, what did we expect from a President who once bragged, on a TV show, about his approach to new, beautiful women: “Grab ’em by the pussy.”.

This is a guy who likes to hear himself talk and see himself on TV, maximizing the adage, “All publicity is good publicity”. But, when you’re The Leader of The Free World, is live-streaming of your every thought and emotion a good idea, particularly if you come up with a lot of bad ideas?

In the middle of the firestorm over critical policy issues such as Health Care and the Federal Budget, The Boss fired off a brainstorm decision (via Tweeter) to prohibit transgender individuals from serving in the military…without consulting military brass. This stunt raised some serious hackles in the Pentagon, which quickly disavowed Trump’s tweet, but…what else is new? That’s what you get with a One Man Team.

It’s looking more and more like the Donald Trump “opposite” experiment will fail. One wonders how long the G.O.P. will put up with it…

…although the Republicans have been willing to put up with a lot of shit under Trump. One wonders what it is doing to the G.O.P. political base.

Important note: Something noble did happen in Washington D.C. this past week. Senator John McCain, ex-Vietnam War hero and former candidate for President, who has just been diagnosed with brain cancer, got out of his hospital bed to cast the deciding vote to torpedo the Trumpcare legislative fiasco. He’s a Republican, and one of the few G.O.P.ers with big enough balls to defy bully Trump…who was a draft-dodger during the Vietnam War, and insulted McCain during the campaign as “No hero”, because his jet was shot down, he was captured, and spent six years in a concentration camp being brutalized by his captors. (Heroes, according to Trump, are guys who don’t get captured. Go figure.)

On behalf of the millions who have served their country with honor, it must have given this War Hero McCain pleasure to put the K-Bar knife into the Draft Dodger in Chief.

Senator McCain said, after voting “No!” on the lame “repeal and replace” bill, that the time has come for the two parties to take up the matter seriously, together, and come up with fixes and improvements to Obamacare.

Finally, an adult in the room! This is what our Congress and Senate are supposed to do…actually work together to better the Nation.

(Of course, like most legislators, Senator McCain has been party to plenty of Republican obstructionism over the past ten years. His “seeing the light” comes almost like a deathbed conversion, once he was diagnosed with cancer of the brain, and won’t be running for re-election. But, better late than never. He obviously wants to leave this earth with head held high.)

Hopefully, Born Again Public Servant McCain will live long enough to see his seed of wisdom (i.e. the novel idea of teamwork) germinate in the political “swamp” that is Washington D.C.

I’ll believe that when I see it.

Update: “The Mooch” succeeded in torpedoing Reince Priebus with the “fucking paranoid schizophrenic” charge before even settling into his Communications Director office in the White House. However, his public denunciation of Senior White House Advisor Bannon as a “cocksucker” seemed to cross some Trumpian line decency, because two days later Priebus’ replacement, ex-General John Kelly, shitcanned The Mooch for…screwing the pooch, so to speak.